Tears in Heaven
by Candid Ishida
Summary: Taito/Yamachi Matt and Tai finally adopt a child of their own, but...things don't always work out the way one had planned.


Tears In Heaven

  
  


"Another day, another dollar..." Yamato collapsed onto the sofa and turned on the TV.

"Leave it to Beaver again? Why is this show always on?"

Matt felt something lick his ear and spun around quickly. There was Tai's kitten sitting

there on the back of the couch.

"Get out of here Youji!" Matt pushed the cat off the couch and it landed gracefully on the

floor. She turned around and gave him kind of a dirty look and scampered off to the bedroom.

"Why does he have to have that dumb cat anyway... I hate cats." Matt stared at the TV

for a while until he felt his eyelids start to feel heavy, and he slowly fell asleep.

A few hours later Matt awoke to a strange smell. It smelled kind of like,

"Smoke!?" Matt jumped up off the couch and slid into the kitchen.

"Tai what are you doing!?"

"I was trying to cook supper for you!" There was Tai frantically trying to put out the fire

that had started in the frying pan. Matt turned the stove off and fanned the smoke away. There in

the pan was, something, burnt to a crisp.

"You think it's done?" Tai asked.

Matt glared at Tai and dumped whatever it was out of the pan and into the garbage can. 

"I keep telling you Tai, don't even bother. Just let me cook."

"But you were asleep. I didn't want to wake you. You looked so cute lying there on the

couch."

Matt glanced up from the pan he was scraping off and smiled at Tai. He set the pan on the

counter and walked over. He placed his hand on Tai's shoulder and lightly brushed a strand of

hair out of his eyes.

"Tai, you're so precious." Matt grinned.

Tai gave Matt a quick kiss on the nose. "You too," Tai slipped under Matt's arm. He

brought the scorched pan to the sink and began scrubbing it.

Matt put his apron on and tied it in the back. "What do you want for supper?"

"I don't know, just whatever." Tai finished washing the pan and dried his hands off. 

"Hey have you seen my cat?"

"I think she's in the bedroom, I tossed her off the back of the couch before."

"What!? Matt stop torturing my cat! What did she ever do to you?"

Matt grumbled. "I hate cats...I don't see why you insist on having that animal around

anyway."

"Because I like cats, she's my baby." Tai wandered into the bedroom in search of Youji.

"Baby..." Matt sighed. His thoughts drifted off as he absentmindedly took some things

out of the refrigerator. How he wanted one, a child of his own. For so many years he had longed

for a child, but that was one disadvantage of his relationship with Tai.

"Hey Matt,"

"Huh?" Matt turned around to see Tai leaning against the counter top, holding his cat.

"The fish and rice looks good, but what are you planning on doing with that peanut

butter?"

"What?" Matt looked down at his hand and realized he was holding a jar of peanut butter. 

"Oh, um, nothing." He shoved it back in the fridge and began making supper.

  
  


Later that night, Matt and Tai lied in bed. Tai was petting his cat while Matt sat up

against his pillow reading.

"Who's a cute kitty?" Tai smiled. Youji purred happily and rubbed her face against Tai's

hand.

Matt closed his book softly and set it down on the bedside table. "Tai I want to talk to

you about something."

"What is it?"

Matt looked down at the cat and sighed. 

"If you want me to get rid of my cat the answer is no!"

"What? No, no that's not it." Matt ran his fingers through his hair. "Tai... have you ever

thought about, children?"

"What about them?"

"I mean... you and I, starting a family and raising kids."

Tai looked a little surprised. "Um, I never really thought about that before,"

Matt felt a lump form in his throat. "Tai, I really want to have kids, I have for a long time

I just never felt it was the right time to tell you."

"You could have talked to me about this any time Yami, I mean, we've been together for

six years."

"Seven years..."

"Oh yeah, seven"

Tai could tell Matt was troubled. He leaned over and kissed him softly on the cheek. 

"Matt if you want children then so do I."

Matt shifted his eyes to Tai's face, who was now leaning his head on Matt's shoulder.

"You mean it?"

"Of course I mean it, I love you and I'd be happy to raise a family with you Yami."

Matt was overcome with joy. He felt a tear form in the corner of his eye and wrapped his

arms around Taichi. 

"You really are precious Tai."

"Hey don't squeeze me so hard!"

  
  
  
  


Matt slammed the door behind him. Tai took off his shoes and put on his slippers. He

watched Matt throw his coat onto the couch and storm into the bedroom, he was steaming.

"I hate this!!!" he heard Matt scream from the bedroom. Youji ran out and jumped into

Tai's arms.

"It's ok Youji..." He set the little orange puffball down on the floor. He walked in slowly

and saw Matt lying face down on the bed.

"Matt?"

"What," he heard Matt growl.

Tai sat down on the bed. "Come on Matt you just need to be patient."

"I'm sick of being patient!" Mat sat up and leaned over the edge of the bed. He rubbed

his temples and stared at the floor. "Every adoption agency we go to denies us, I'm tired of it!

We meet every standard, married couple, financially stable, good medical history, but they keep

denying us anyway!!"

Tai sighed and crawled over behind Matt. He started rubbing his shoulders, trying to

relieve his tension.

"Don't worry Yami we'll get a baby soon."

Matt closed his eyes and relaxed as his lover massaged his shoulders and back. Tai always

seemed to make him feel better, there was just something about him. Matt turned and leaned

back on the bed. He looked up at Taichi and traced his finger along the contour of Tai's tan face.

"I love you, you know that?"

"I know," Tai smiled.

He leaned over and kissed Matt's lips and ran his fingers through his silky blonde hair. 

Then Tai rolled over and lied next to Matt.

"But I still hate your stupid cat," Matt snickered.

"Yami!" Tai shoved a pillow in Matt's face and they both laughed.

Youji, who was sleeping on the back of the couch, opened one eye. She wondered what

those silly humans were doing in there this time.

  
  


"Tai, she's so beautiful!" Matt said as he gazed down at the tiny baby in his arms. After

months of waiting, they were finally going to bring home their baby daughter.

"Have you picked a name yet?" The adoption counselor asked Matt.

He looked up. "Oh that's right, she doesn't have one yet."

"Yes, she's only two months old and had no name when she was taken in."

"Tai how about Kamiwaza?" Matt said to Tai, who was peeking over his shoulder at the

baby.

"Miracle?"

Matt nodded.

"That's a perfect name," Tai smiled.

  
  


Tai opened the door and Matt stepped inside holding the baby.

"This is your new home Kamiwaza Ishida!" Matt said happily as he walked inside. Matt

and Tai both sat down on the couch.

Kamiwaza's sparkling blue eyes looked around the room, taking everything in. Just then

Youji jumped up on the couch.

"Tai! Get Youji away from the baby!"

"Yami she's just curious, Youji's a member of this family too."

"Curiosity killed the cat," Matt grumbled.

Youji sniffed Kamiwaza's hair and her whiskers twitched. She licked the baby's face and

Kamiwaza cooed happily.

"See? They like each other. And besides, Youji wouldn't hurt a fly," Tai said.

As Youji looked at the baby she reached up and wrapped her little fingers around Youji's

fur and tugged on it. Youji meowed loudly and leaped off the couch.

"That a girl! You show that nasty cat who's boss!" Matt said, tickling Kamiwaza. Tai

sighed.

Later that afternoon the doorbell to the apartment rang. Tai opened it up and TK and

Kari, who were now married, were standing outside.

"We wanted to stop by to meet the new baby," Kari smiled.

TK walked up to his brother and stuck a cigar in his mouth. 

"Every new father needs a cigar!" TK grinned.

"Yeah TK, I'll be sure to smoke it real close to the baby," Matt rolled his eyes and set the

cigar down on the counter.

"Well where is she?" TK asked.

"She's in her playpen, I'll go get her," Matt said and walked into the other room.

Tai, TK and Kari all sat down in the parlour. The sun shone brightly through the large

window and created a tic-tac-toe board pattern on the floor.

"I never thought that our brothers would be the first ones with a kid." TK said.

"Me neither," Kari said.

Tai looked into the other room and saw Matt putting a pink jumper on Kamiwaza, talking

to her. "I've never seen him so happy in my life."

"Say hi to your aunt and uncle, Kami!" Matt said as he brought the baby into the room.

"Oh she's so cute!" Kari said and stood up quickly. "May I hold her?"

"Of course but,"

Kari took the baby in her arms, but Kamiwaza started crying at the top of her lungs. Kari

tried to calm her but she wouldn't stop screaming. Matt took the baby out of Kari's arms and she

immediately stopped crying.

"She won't let anyone but Matt pick her up." Tai said.

"Not even you Tai?" TK asked.

"Nope," Tai watched Matt hold Kamiwaza to his chest and give her a soft kiss on the

head. He rocked back and forth humming, and she slowly fell asleep in his arms. Tai smiled

softly as the sun reflected the image of father and child in his brown eyes.

  
  


"Come on Kami, eat your peas!" Matt was desperately trying to get Kamiwaza to eat her

baby food. He smiled and held the spoon up to her face.

"Open up!" Matt's smile slowly changed to a frown and peas splattered all over his face. 

"Ok, so you don't like peas." He set the spoon down on the high chair tray and wiped his face

off. He then bent over to pick up the spoon which Kamiwaza had tossed on the floor and was

now giggling contentedly to herself.

"I never have any trouble getting her to eat," Tai said from the sofa.

"Well what have you been feeding her?"

"She likes those little sugar cubes in the bowl on the table," Tai said, motioning towards

the dining room table.

"What!? You've been giving the baby sugar cubes!? Tai what do you think she is? A

horse!?"

"What?" Tai said innocently, "She likes them"

Matt grumbled and picked Kamiwaza up out of her high chair. "Let's get you cleaned

up." He went into the bedroom and changed her clothes and came back out.

"Tai you can't feed a baby sugar, OW!" Kamiwaza grabbed a hold of Matt's hair and

tugged on it.

"Don't pull daddy's hair OW please, please let go!" Matt struggled to get his hair out of

the baby's hand.

"Maybe if your hair wasn't so long she wouldn't pull it," Tai said.

"Look who's talking...."

Tai got up off the couch and walked over to Matt and Kamiwaza. 

"Hey Yami you've still got some peas on your face." Tai leaned up and licked the baby

food off Matt's cheek.

"Tai!! Not in front of the baby!" Matt hissed.

"What? I'm only allowed to love you behind closed doors now? She'll never remember,

she's just a baby." Kamiwaza sucked her thumb and looked at Tai.

"See? She doesn't have a clue." Kamiwaza then reached out and grabbed Tai's mass of

brown hair.

"Hey!" 

Matt snickered as Tai tried to free himself from Kamiwaza's tiny clutches.

  
  


"He's changed so much in the past couple months, it's like that whole 'I don't care'

attitude just flew out the window." Tai said into the phone. Sora listened from the other end.

Tai looked into the bedroom . There was Matt asleep on the bed and Kamiwaza asleep in

her crib right next to him. He was so exhausted from spending every waking moment taking care

of his precious daughter.

"Tai, I've gotta go ok?" Sora said.

"Huh? Oh ok, talk to you soon Sora." Tai placed the phone back in the receiver. He

quietly walked into the bedroom and sat down next to Matt.

"It's amazing how happy he is. It's like his life is complete now or something." Tai

looked up and saw Kamiwaza rolling around in her crib a bit. Tai stood up and looked down into

the crib at her. She had her fingers in her mouth, sucking on them.

"Hey, go back to sleep Kami, it's nap time." Tai turned the musical mobile on that was

hanging above her crib.

Tai heard Matt yawn and sit up. "Oh...she's awake again?" he said sleepily.

Matt stood up and put his arm around Tai. "Come on Kami, go to sleep sweety." 

Kamiwaza reached her arms up towards Matt, wanting to be picked up. He pulled her blanket

over her and ran his hand over her feathery hair.

"Go to sleep, little one. Rest your eyes till the morning sun. While you slumber have no

fear, for when you wake, I will be here." Matt sang softly and the tiny baby drifted back to sleep.

"I've got to hand it to you Matt I've never seen anybody take care of a baby as well as

you." Matt put his arms around Tai and kissed him.

"And I've never seen anyone sit back and watch someone take care a of a baby as well as

you Tai," he grinned.

"Hey I try to help! But everything I do makes her cry!"

Matt just smiled and brushed Tai's hair out of his eyes. Tai put his arms around Matt's

waist and pulled him closer.

"First a match made in heaven, and now baby makes three." Matt sighed happily. Just

then Youji wandered into the room and rubbed up against Tai's pant-leg.

"Don't forget cat!" Tai said.

Matt groaned, "I hate cats...."

  
  


Matt woke up and put his feet in the cold floor. It was some time between midnight and

one in the morning, and he had a sudden urge to get up. He walked slowly across the bedroom in

the pitch black and heard a loud yowl.

"Stupid cat! Get out of my way!" his whispered to Youji, who he had stumbled over.

Matt walked out into the kitchen and poured him self a glass of milk. He swallowed it

down quickly and tossed the cup in the sink.

"I'll just wash it in the morning" Matt yawned and walked back into the bedroom. As

Matt walked by the baby's crib, there was an eerie stillness in the room. He leaned over and

looked in.

"Kami..." Matt nudged the baby, but she did not wake up. He switched on the bedside

lamp and peered into the crib. Matt's breath caught in his throat. His eyes opened wide in horror

and he put his hands over his mouth.

Matt's legs went weak underneath his and he collapsed onto the bed, waking Tai up.

"Matt?"

Matt grabbed Tai's shirt and pressed his face into Tai's chest, his eyes still wide open.

"Yami? What's wrong!?"

"My baby," Matt managed to choke out. "My baby."

Tai stood over and leaned into the crib. He gasped and put his hand over his heart. 

Kamiwaza's body was motionless.

"Oh Matt." Tai sat back on the bed in shock. 

Yamato clutched Tai's shirt and sobbed into it. Tai's arms wrapped around him and held

onto him tightly. He could feel Matt breaking into a cold sweat. Tai's face twisted up in anguish

and he wept, his tears falling into Matt's hair.

"Yami...."

Matt's body shook and he felt like a knife had been stabbed through his chest. How

could this be real? How could a happy reality be shattered like a brick hitting a mirror. In just

one night Matt's world collapsed around him.

  
  


A soft mist surrounded the area and the clouds blocked out the sun. Tai rubbed Matt's

back desperately trying to comfort him as the tiny casket was lowered into the ground. The

funeral party payed their last respects and slowly dispersed. Sora walked up to matt and took his

hands.

"Matt I'm so sorry," she said from underneath the black veil that hung down from her hat.

"What do you care, you can have children any time." he snapped at her. Matt turned and

walked away.

"Thank you for coming Sora," Tai sighed.

"Of course." Sora watched Matt as he walked off into the fog. "He's...not taking it very

well is he?"

Tai shook his head. "I don't know if he'll ever be the same," Tai said quietly.

Matt walked past the rows of headstones. They were all ancient, with mold growing in

their crevices. Matt could almost feel the whispers of the dead the surrounded him in the

cemetery. 

"Sudden infant death syndrome," the doctor's words echoed through his mind. 

"Sometimes, even when every safety precaution is taken it just happens. There was probably

nothing you could have done."

He sat down on a rock and stared down at the ground. The cold wind blew against his

tear stained face and tangled his hair. His blue eyes had lost all their sparkle, it was almost as if

his soul had died along with his daughter.

"Why God," he sobbed, "What did I do to deserve this? I don't understand. Was I not

meant to be happy? I just don't understand!" Matt grabbed a pebble and flung it as hard as he

could.

"It's not fair. Why would you take away the only thing that fulfilled me? Why!?" Matt

stood up and screamed into the heavens. Matt clenched his teeth and fell to his knees. He

slammed his fists against the broken stone path until his hands were bruised and bloody. 

"My beautiful baby, why did you take her from me? Why not me instead?" Yamato lied

down on the ground and let the rain wash over him. 

  
  


"Is he doing any better Tai?" Sora asked.

"No, he's the same. He's just devastated, he hasn't smiled in weeks. My poor Yami, I

wish he didn't have to go through this. He's a broken man...."

Matt walked slowly up to the grave site and placed a single rose on Kamiwaza's grave.

"You were with me such a short time my angel, I'm so sorry. I wish I could have done

something." Tears flowed from his eyes and he sobbed. He wrapped his arms around the cross

shaped headstone and cried. 

"Go to sleep, little one, rest your eyes till the morning sun. While you slumber, have no

fear, for when you wake, I will be here."


End file.
